Nadezhda Koroleva

As I read it avidly, I was feeling it as something familiar to my own feelings, and I couldn’t explain why. At the age of 12, I met Krishnaits and went to the ashram. I distributed Prabhupada's books, studied at a special school, spoke and wrote in English perfectly, and after school I translated spiritual literature late into the night. It seemed to me I had gotten a true happiness. I dreamt I was entering into University department of foreign languages and was devoting my life to saint scripture translations.
But there is no fleeing from fate and during exams I broke my leg. Consequently, I didn’t enroll in the University.

It was a great shock for me, as well as for my parents.

I was devastated with the feeling of disappointment in God and belief. Afterwards it dawned on me that it was a part of God’s plan for me.

I was forced to work because my family was poor at that time. Accidentally, although with the hidden purpose, I met a very rich man. In no time he proposed to me and became my husband. He took gentle care of me and due to his financial situation; I could get my fortunate university degree in economics. I was awarded a degree with honors. In 2002 I defended my PhD thesis on the topic of "Money and Credit Policy"

The years of education in political economy had given me a scientific-materialistic outlook. Simultaneously, I was seriously studying psychology. Thus my idealism, faith in God, and yoga practice organically combined me with the materialism of Karl Marx and the pragmatism of the great economists of the world. This combination made me become an idealistic materialist, who tried to discern the rational nature of the infinite Whole behind phenomena.

Being a third year student, I had already made business deals and earned my first separate commissions. I went on business trips, sold wholesale spare parts, drove convoys, etc. In a word, I was doing the same what all other entrepreneurs in the late 1990s did. I was not an ideal housewife: I had my own opinion on everything, and my husband and I quickly separated, and broke up because of our dramatically differing outlooks.

As the typical case in our country after the divorce, I was left with nothing, although I already had my business partners, suppliers and buyers. Then I entered into a new serious relationship and embarked on a new business situation. For many years, I was engaged in the international trade of raw materials and food. There were gains and losses, achievements and betrayals. I have traveled all over the world, and donated a lot of money to charity.

Up to the age of 28 there was a period of materialism, achievement, and consumption in my life. I relied only on myself: my single retreats were yoga, logic, philosophy, and a scientific approach to psychology and willpower. But one day, on New Year's Eve, there was a sudden Awakening.

During a business trip by train, my soul suddenly left the physical body, looked at it from the side and ascended to the Higher worlds. I was shown the whole chain of reincarnations and my life roles. I understood who I was, and that the whole turbulence of this incarnation had given me the opportunity to develop the skills which were necessary for my further work.

Every single mistake and failure, love and disappointments in my previous life were aimed to strengthen the spirit and will, to cleanse from the layers of cliche and samskaras, which were affects and unconscious reactions. Karma always knows in advance, who exactly we must become.

At the age of 28 I went into sannyasa: the period of apprenticeship with the Great Teachers began. My business career continued, but a few years later I started also counseling people. I follow the great vow of the yogis (brahmacharya, asteya, aparigraha, ahimsa, satya): I live in renunciation, my feelings and desires do not dominate my actions. I do not feel affection. I am content with basic needs. I am detached from both simplicity and luxury. I am a vegetarian. I do not smoke, and do not use alcohol and drugs.

Of course, there are those who don't like me, those who are angry with me, and there are those who are jealous. To everyone who has experienced unpleasant feelings due to my activities, I apologize. But I am a warrior, not a dutiful blind pleasing person. I am a kind person. I love people. I avoid conflicts and I always see the best in people. Nevertheless, if I am attacked, then turning the other cheek is not my principle. I'm not perfect, but I've achieved a lot and I am able to do much more.